There isn’t a formal definition of Mom Burnout, but in general doctors, psychologists, therapists, and other parenting specialists recognize mom burnout as a state of mental, emotional, and physical exhaustion associated with parenting and the tasks of parenting.
What does “mom burnout” look like in real life?
- Feeling so exhausted that you feel like you “have nothing left to give”
- Feeling detached and/or disconnected
- Feeling unproductive
- Having Mom Rage aka Postpartum Rage
- Not taking care of self
What are other (more physical) symptoms of “mom burnout”?
- Tiredness
- Sleep issues
- Trouble focusing
- Mood swings
- Negative thoughts and attitudes
- Feeling isolated
- Unable to finish tasks
- Could manifest physically as headaches, stomachaches, tightening of the chest, hair loss
Most moms feel at least some of these symptoms some of the time. So it seems like burnout would indicate more symptoms, or lasting longer, or more severe than your “mom normal”
IF you think that your symptoms are unusual, out of the ordinary, lasting longer than they should in short, if you think you are experiencing burnout please talk to a trusted doctor/professional.
Here are some ways you can help avoid Mom Burnout, or help recover from Mom Burnout:
- Be less critical of yourself. Easier said than done, but give yourself the same break you’d give to others. Think about the advice you’d give to a girlfriend who’s going thru the same thing and then try to do the same for yourself.
- Build a Support System – ideally your support system would be made up of friends and family who are near you and who can step in to help. But if you don’t live near family and friends try to create a new support system. Join a local moms group (found thru most churches and hospital, or even local libraries), or join a special interest group like moms and babies swimming group, music group, or even try to make friends with moms at a local free baby story time at a library. Reach out to neighbors, but do find people near you that you can talk to, and share with.
- Be honest and talk about what you are going thru with friends and family. Listen to their suggestions, but remember you are your baby’s best expert, and your best expert too. Do what works for you. Accept their help when they offer.
- Ask for help. It can be hard to ask for help. Sometimes if feels like admitting we aren’t good enough as moms, but sometimes being a good mom means knowing when you need a little help and then asking for and accepting it.
- Create routines. Routines can help get thru the difficult days. It’s the whole put one foot in front of the other thing. But do not make a strict/impossible schedule for yourself. It will just make it harder. Try to schedule some me time even if it’s just 5 minutes for a shower or a cup of coffee alone.
- Monotask rather than multitask. Be present in that one thing you are doing.
- Lower expectations for a while. If you are feeling overwhelmed, give yourself the permission to take everything off your list that isn’t essential. Just for a while. It can make a huge difference to take a little “vacation” from all the things you are trying to accomplish.
- Nourish YOUR body too
- Detach from Social Media -especially if it is leading to mommy comparison.
Take care of you, mama! You can do this!!
